Many young women work hard and work under pressure.
Pressure to prove yourself.
Pressure to be “the responsible one.”
Pressure to not mess up.
Pressure to represent women well.
Pressure to be excellent and agreeable.
All of these make many early-career women quietly build a lifestyle where rest is allowed, and fun is suspicious.
You’ll sleep, but won’t dance.
You’ll take a break, but not laugh.
You’ll stop working, but you won’t play.
Somewhere along the line, you learned the belief that “If I’m enjoying myself, I must be wasting time.”
You must have heard the “soft life” trend and what most people miss is that a soft life is not about laziness. True soft life is about sustainability.
Many young women are trying to build a successful life while also healing from emotional exhaustion, family pressure, financial stress, and high expectations. This combination creates a silent crisis: where You are physically present at work, but mentally drained. Mentally drained people over think, second-guess, procrastinate and become reactive leading to confidence loss.
As a coach, I see this pattern constantly
When people lose play, they lose access to their authentic selves.
Play is where you remember:
- what you enjoy
- what makes you feel alive
- what energizes you naturally
- what you like outside of performance
This is critical because purpose is not found in pressure. It is found in clarity and clarity comes when your mind is not constantly in survival mode.
Your brain has two key modes
- Focused mode (deep work, deadlines, analysis)
- Diffuse mode (relaxed thinking, creativity, insight)
Most young professionals live permanently in focused mode and the diffuse mode is where your brain connects dots, solves problems, and produces original ideas.
This is why your best ideas often come
- in the shower
- while walking
- while laughing with friends
- while cooking
- during a random moment of joy
Play unlocks the part of your brain that hustle may not access.
For better productivity, ponder on how to recover smarter as you work hard.
Benefits of Play and fun
1. It protects your confidence: Burnout makes you emotionally fragile. Small feedback feels like rejection and minor mistakes feel like failure. Fun reminds your nervous system that you are safe, you can breathe and handle pressure and this emotional stability builds confidence.
2. It boosts your creativity: Leadership is problem-solving. If you are always stressed, you will keep recycling old ideas. Play expands your imagination which is a leadership asset.
3. It strengthens your relationships: Many people are lonely not because they do not know people, but because they do not feel safe enough to be fully themselves. Play builds connection. It gives you shared experiences beyond work stress and “adulting complaints.”
Strong relationships are essential for leadership.
4. It improves decision-making: A tired mind makes impulsive decisions. A playful, rested mind makes wise decisions. Play reduces internal noise, and wise women lead from inner peace.
How to Add Play Into Your Week (Without Becoming Irresponsible)
You do not need a vacation to start playing again. You need intentional micro-moments.
1. Schedule fun like a meeting
When you do not schedule it, your life will delete it. This one I have learned from my colleagues from other nationals. Put it on your calendar:
- a dance class
- a movie night
- a long walk with music
- an hour to paint, bake, or journal
- brunch with your girls
- a solo café date
Fun is not what you do when time appears.
Fun is what you prioritize because you are wise.
2. Choose “low-effort joy”
You do not need money to play.
You need permission.
- sit outside in the evening
- laugh at a silly show
- take pictures of the sky
- play a game with siblings
- try a new recipe
- listen to music and clean
The goal is not always luxury but to bring relief to your nervous system.
3. Make play part of your identity
Do not treat joy like an occasional visitor ( I am guilty of this). Treat it like a lifestyle.
Say it out loud: “I am a woman who works hard and lives fully.”
The most dangerous version of ambition is the one that slowly kills your joy and when joy dies, purpose becomes heavy.
If purpose becomes heavy, you start resenting the very life you prayed for.
Play is a productivity hack and more importantly, play is a self-awareness practice.
It helps you stay connected to who you are, not just what you produce.
It is the difference between success that looks good and success that feels good.